Dear Cleveland Heights Police Officer

I got pulled over for speeding last night, something that hasn't happened in probably 8 years. And that's quite an accomplishment, given that the Cleveland Heights area in general is very tricky to navigate. The signs change from 35 mph to 25 mph frequently, and the cops aggressively monitor these areas. I almost feel badly for any guests who come to my house, because I can name several of them who have been pulled over while on their way to or from my house.

I'm not sure what was going through my head as I passed one of the 25 mph areas yesterday---except I was listening to one of M's mix tapes and probably thinking about him--but I completely forgot about it and sailed through at 40. Just as I realized it, the cop pulled out behind me, and for the first time, I wasn't filled with my usual resolve to play dumb. He had caught me. And I knew better. So when he asked if I knew the speed limit, I told him it was 25 mph, that I just hadn't been thinking. He asked if I lived here, to which I told him I did. That I travelled this road almost every day. Again, I really knew better. When he asked if I knew how fast I was going, I told him it was probably 40 mph, which he confirmed was true. I was figuratively pulling my pants down for a spanking (in the form of a ticket), which is why I was confused when the officer said he wasn't going to give me one. "Because you were honest with me," he said.

How intriguing. Because I was honest with him? Here it was, the one time in my life I thought I really did deserve a ticket after being pulled over. The one time I had no excuses and didn't even feel like defending myself in the least. The one time I admitted I knew the limit, lived in the area, and knowingly sailed through at 15 over. Busted, right? Or not. Whatever. I'll take it.
.