The Toilet Lid Footprint

For months now I have been deeply troubled over seeing what appears to be (read: most definitely is) a faint shoe print on top of my toilet lid. The one that goes down over the bowl to cover it up when not in use. Someone is somehow stepping on my toilet, and this is disturbing for many reasons, most notably because I live alone. And cannot remember having stepped on my toilet. Ever. Even more disturbing than seeing the shoe print is cleaning it off and then seeing it again the following week. No matter how many times I clean the shoe print off, it always comes back. Naturally I have had no choice but to conclude that someone is breaking into my house via the bathroom window and stepping on the toilet on their way in. Nevermind the fact that this person isn't taking anything (maybe they are just living in my attic?) or the fact that one wouldn't even need to step on the toilet when climbing in the bathroom window. Because there is simply no other explanation.

So imagine my surpreeze when earlier this week I happened to look down while brushing my teeth and realize that I had my leg up, Captain Morgan style, on the toilet. Apparently this is my position of choice while standing at the sink, because I've caught myself doing it all the time now that I'm conscious of it. It makes sense then why the print is always the same (my house shoes...I don't like being barefoot) and in the same place. And I'm not sure which is more disturbing: that I was sure there was a homeless person living in my attic, that I could be habitually doing something and literally have no idea, or that I've apparently got a little Captain in me.

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